Dirty Little Heart

So, Ian Watkins, the lead singer of the Lostprophets band, has been sentenced to 35 years in prison. This means, in reality, he’ll be out in about 17 years, when he’ll be 53 years old. He’ll still have a fully functional set of genitals, as well as a healthy bank account. I can’t help but wonder if he’ll be off to do a tour of south-east Asia, just like Gary Glitter did. Maybe they’ll get together and practice their vile perversion in tandem. Who knows, they might even decide to release a duet single. They can call themselves Nonce.

For anyone who doesn’t know, Ian Watkins is a scum-bastard paedophile. His crimes against children are enough to make any decent person feel physically sick. The man even admitted trying to rape a baby. He tried to rape a baby!

This surely is a crime worthy of execution. A man capable of such utter depravity should not be allowed to live. If he was a dog we’d have him destroyed. So let’s treat him like a dog and put him down.

The recent revelations about child abuse at the BBC and the stories in the papers about paedophile rings show that this is a growing crime. So, it’s time to start dishing out some harsher sentences. We recently had a badger cull; so how about a paedophile cull? These are surely members of society we can do without.

We could make a reality game show out of it. Paedophiles are rounded up and released into a town surrounded by an electric fence. Contestants are then given 48 hours to kill as many as they can, with bonus points given for more creative and more painful deaths. The winner gets a million pounds, a recording contract, and a part in Eastenders. We could call it The Strictly Nonce Factor, and get Davina McCall to host it.

How about a version of I’m a Celebrity…? We can call it “I’m a Paedophile, Get me Out of Here!” The idea is to put a group of paedophiles into the jungle, and then release various deadly animals to kill them. The one who lives the longest gets a humane death by gunshot to the head.

However we do it, we have got to wipe out this vile disease. Prison is not the answer. It didn’t stop Gary Glitter or Jon Venables. The punishment must be stronger. At the very least, it should include chemical castration.

Paedophilia is one of the most disgusting crimes there is. It’s time to make the punishment equally as vile.